Yes, I’m 31. Yes, I’m single. Yes, I live with my BFF. No, I am not a lesbian.

Okay, so this has been a post that’s been on my mind for a while. It’s a topic that comes up far more often than I would like in my daily life, and I’ve decided that it’s time to just write about it, get it on paper (or the internet, whatever) and let people read or not read as they see fit.

There really isn’t much else to say that the title of this post doesn’t already cover, however, I’d like to address each of these points on their own so I can just refer people to this blog post in the future and not have to explain myself a billion and a half times.

Let’s take the “Yes, I live with my BFF” point. For those of you that don’t know me real well (why the hell are you reading this?) my bff and I have known each other for 24 years. While we didn’t really care for each other at first (she was bossy, I was a tattle-tale) after about a year we pretty much became inseparable and have been that way ever since. Even though fights, moves, and more fights (bad ones, I might add) we’ve gotten through them and have somehow turned out stronger for it. She is the person that I share everything with, she knows me better than I know myself sometimes, knows my deepest secrets, my regrets, things I’ve accomplished, and things that I’m not proud of.

I’m a part of her family – in that I’m invited to holidays, address her aunts and uncles as MY aunts and uncles, and think of her cousins as my own. Her grandma is my “grams”. Same goes for her and my family. She’s always invited to things, it’s a given that if I’m there – she’ll be there. It’s just how it is. Has been for 24 years, and things aren’t changing any time soon.

We live together, we work together, and you know what? We’re not dating. While our relationship may extend past the typical “best friend” norms, I get so sick of people assuming that because we’re basically joined at the hip, that we’re a “couple”. I’ve had family members flat out ask me if I’m gay, if she is my “partner”, and if I’m going to “come out”.

Here’s the answer – no, yes, and no. The only “coming out” that I’ve ever done, and plan on doing, is “coming out of the broom closet” by telling people I practice paganism, a point which also DOES NOT make me a lesbian devil worshiper.



My bff and I are soul-mates – in the way that Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha, and

Miranda are soul-mates… except there are only two of us. I think people don’t understand what it’s like to have a best friend like I do. That is the only thing that

I can think of – the only reason that people constantly ask me that question. They haven’t found “their person” yet… and that really sucks for them.


Okay, that point is done. Now onto the others that pretty much go hand in hand. If ONE MORE f’ing person asks me when I’m getting married, I’m PROBABLY going to lose my g-d mind on them. No kidding. I’m 31. I am not ancient. My eggs have not dried up and I am not in danger of becoming an old spinster woman, regardless of what my apartment with my bff and 3 cats says about me.

I could date. I just want to get that out there. I HAVE dated, for those of you that are wondering, and you know what? The guys that I have dated are all weird. Really, really weird. And I haven’t wanted to explore a date 2, let alone think about settling down with any of them. I don’t want to settle because people think I should. And let me tell you – I have self doubt about this ALL the time where I waver back and forth about being single at “my age” and then I get furious with myself because – NEWS FLASH – I’m HAPPY being single!

Yep. There you have it. I’m 31, with two younger sisters, one that is already married, and one that is getting married in 6 months and I AM HAPPY BEING SINGLE. I feel like I should get this printed on a sandwich board and wear it when I go out to family events. I do not, and will never, measure myself based on if I have a man in my life or not.

Just so we’re on the same page – I’m single, I’m over 30, I live with my best friend and three cats, and I am the happiest that I have ever been IN MY LIFE. I’ve found me – and me is pretty awesome.  I’m a little dark, I a little strange, a little on the crazy side. I’m bossy, I eat chips for breakfast, I’m a pop culture junkie, and fall in love with fictional characters on the regular… and I’m good with that.

I’ve made many, MANY mistakes in my life, and this year of 2013, have cleaned up my act more than I have in any amount of years combined. I’m a force to be reckoned with, in a 5’4″ body, and I’m happy right where I am.



2 thoughts on “Yes, I’m 31. Yes, I’m single. Yes, I live with my BFF. No, I am not a lesbian.

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